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Eh Tabarnac!
Posted: 2007-12-22 by Dan

Eh I am Dan, I am from Chippewa so shut the fuck up!


EDI Laffs, Gaffs and Blunders: Holy fucking obvious....
Posted: 2007-12-21 by MikeB

Edition V3.10: Holy fucking obvious ....

Me: Hey - we had an Invoice rejected from that Large US based retailer.

Foolio: Ok what was this issue?

Me: Well it seems they don't like receiving invoices without an invoice number on them.

Foolio: Eh why not?

Me: Yeah they're funny that way, plus the purchase order number might have not been recognized.

Foolio: Eh what was the purchase order number?

Me: Ordinarily a Purchase Order number like "TEST ORDER PLEASE DELETE" indicates that it should not be processed.

Foolio: Eh this is so hard, I wonder how would I know that it was a test order, and that should be deleted?

Me: Oh lord take me away....




Ho Ho Whore!
Posted: 2007-12-05 by MikeB

Christmas lights. Ugh.

So I start off, stretch out the 40' of icycle lights to see what's working and what's not. Ok, 5 bulbs out of maybe 300 burnt out. Hooh hah! No problems, pop in 5 replacement. Put them back in tha box, haul them and a ladder outside. I rapidly start to re-hang the lights in the same place as last year, all is going well. It's going to be magical. Then the ladder gives out, I fall ontop of aformentioned ladder. A little physics knowledge tells us that a 180 lb objext falling onto an aluminum ladder laying on its side has a net result of one MANGLED ladder. Not a single bit of aluminum remains unbent. Add a scraped ankle just for fun. But ok, I hobble around and get the rest attached to the eavetrough. Plug it in and voila! 1/4 of the lights arent working. FUCK!!!! Now I'm steaming. So what's a pissed off Canadian do? Grab a hockey stick and bust all those fucking lights off the house, then go inside and have a beer.

Going to buy new lights today.  Fuck.


Who wants 40,000 pints of stolen beer?
Posted: 2007-11-30 by Mike G

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By SHAWN POGATCHNIK
Associated Press Writer
 
DUBLIN, Ireland (AP) -- Irish police were hunting for a beer bandit who stole 450 full kegs from the Guinness brewery - the largest heist ever at Ireland's largest brewer.

National police said a lone man drove into the brewery - a Dublin landmark and top tourist attraction - on Wednesday and hitched his truck to a fully loaded trailer awaiting delivery to city pubs.

Diageo PLC, the beverage company that owns Guinness, said the brewery had never suffered such a large-scale theft before in its 248-year history.

Police declined to say whether the theft had been captured by closed-circuit surveillance cameras. No description of the suspect was issued, suggesting that nobody got a good look at him.

Each keg holds about 88 British-sized pints, the most common serving size in Ireland, equivalent to 20 ounces each. The total theft involves 39,600 pints with a retail value exceeding $235,000.

Police said it would be difficult for the thief to sell the stolen beer without attracting attention, unless he has criminal associates who own a network of pubs.

But customs agents say it is common for pubs to sell stolen or smuggled cigarettes and alcohol, particularly counterfeit-labeled supplies of vodka, to avoid paying hefty taxes.

In the past, the outlawed Irish Republican Army and other gangs have hijacked truck shipments of alcoholic beverages and cigarettes for resale in pubs run by sympathizers or friends. Those raids typically happen in rural areas, never in the center of Dublin.

The Republic of Ireland, a country of 4.2 million, has more than 10,000 pubs and bars. The Guinness brewery in Dublin is the biggest supplier, producing more than 5 million kegs annually.

© 2007 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.
 




Holy Humour
Posted: 2007-11-29 by Mike G

A train hits a bus load of Catholic school girls and they all perish. They are all in heaven trying to enter the pearly gates past St. Peter.

St. Peter asks the first girl, "Jessica, have you ever had any contact with a penis?"
She giggles and shyly replies, "Well I once touched the head of one with the tip of my finger."
St. Peter says, "OK, dip the tip of your finger in The Holy Water and pass through the gate."

St. Peter asks the next girl the same question, "Jennifer have you ever had any contact with a penis?"
The girl is a little reluctant but replies, "Well once I fondled and stroked one."
St. Peter says, "OK, dip your whole hand in The Holy Water and pass through the gate."

All of a sudden there is a lot of commotion in the line of girls, one girl is pushing her way to the front of the line. When she reaches the front of the line St. Peter says, "Lisa! What seems to be the rush?" The girl replies, "If I'm going to have to gargle that Holy Water, I want to do it before Tiffany sticks her ass in it."




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