SKILL SAW: A portable cutting tool used to make boards too short.

BELT SANDER: An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor touch-up jobs into major refinishing jobs.

WIRE WHEEL: Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprints and hard-earned calluses from fingers in about the time it takes you to say, ’Oh shit’.

DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, denting the freshly-painted project which you had carefully set in the corner where nothing could get to it.

ADJUSTABLE WRENCH: Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used for the creation of blood-blisters.

HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle... It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.

VICE-GRIPS: Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.

OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for igniting various flammable objects in your garage and creating a fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside the wheel hub out of which you want to remove a bearing race.

TABLE SAW: A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood projectiles to test wall integrity. Very effective for digit removal !!

HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering an automobile to the ground after you have installed your new brakes, trapping the jack handle firmly under the bumper.

BAND SAW: A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to cut large pieces into smaller pieces that more easily fit into the waste bin after you cut on the inside of the line instead of the outside edge.

TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST: A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength of all the crap you forgot to disconnect.

PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under lids or for opening old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing oil on your shirt; but can also be used, as the name implies, to strip out Phillips screw heads.

FLAT SCREWDRIVER: A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used to convert common slotted screws into non-removable screws and butchering your palms.

PRY BAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.

PVC PIPE CUTTER: A tool used to make plastic pipe too short.

HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used as a kind of divining rod to locate the most expensive parts adjacent the object we are trying to hit.

BIGGER HAMMER: Same as a normal hammer but larger in size and weight. Used to make things that don’t fit, fit.

UTILITY KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard cartons delivered to your front door. Works particularly well on contents such as seats, vinyl records, liquids in plastic bottles, collector magazines, refund cheques, and rubber or plastic parts. Especially useful for slicing work clothes, but only while in use.

SON OF A BITCH TOOL: Any handy tool that you grab and throw across the garage while yelling ’Son of a bitch’ at the top of your lungs. It is also, most often, the next tool that you will need.

Marilyn Monroe slept in a bra to keep her assets firm and perky, according to Hollywood lore. A new study out of France suggests it might have been more effective for the screen goddess to go "au naturel" instead.

Researchers spent 15 years studying the breasts of over 330 French women, and concluded that wearing a bra does not prevent sagging or ease back pain as commonly thought. "Medically, physiologically, anatomically—breasts gain no benefit from being denied gravity, Professor Jean-Denis Rouillon, from the University of Besançon, told France Info Radio. "On the contrary, they get saggier with a bra."

Taking measurements with a caliper, the researchers found that by not wearing a bra, muscles around the breast actually strengthened and the "nipple raised 7mm per year toward the shoulder." However, the scientists did not recommend all women abandon their bras since their muscles had probably already degraded.

While the phenomenon of "bra burning" has been greatly exaggerated, in 1970s it was not only politically correct but also fashionable to go braless in the United States. Since then, women have been trussing themselves into increasingly structured—and expensive—undergarments. According to Business Week, the women’s intimates’ industry generates over $11 billion a year in revenues.

The results of the study may be intriguing, but it’s doubtful that droves of American women are going to ditch their bras anytime soon. For one thing, a study by the Center for Talent Innovation found that women who jiggle around the work place are deemed less worthy to become executives by both men and and other women.

Furthermore, the study focused on women ages 18 to 35. According to France’s English-language news site The Local, one 28-year-old participant reported multiple benefits: "I breathe more easily, I carry myself better, and I have no back pain." We’ll see what she says at age 50.

2013 Yahoo! Contributor Network
Copyright © 2013 Yahoo! Inc. All rights reserved. | Yahoo! Lifestyles Network | /

Back to Index

Previous 1 2 ... 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 ... 120 121 Next