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Salt Lake City Winter Olympics 2002 Update
Posted: 2002-02-20 by Mike B

Go Canada Go!

Pbbbbt Hockey - GOLD!

Mens Hockey - GOLD!

Other events - don't matter!


Yes...another Olympics has come and gone, this time with Canada kicking some ass where it counts! And if it wasn't bad enough, we once again got to hear grown men saying, "Hey, wanna come sit on my dick and we'll go tobogganing!"




BHON Winter Energy Saving Tips
Posted: 2002-02-01 by Mike G



Cocking around your house will not only cut your utility bills, but it will also block moisture, insect infestations, dust and allergens. By keeping moisture out of the insulation, it will also be more effective. Many reasonably-priced types of cock are available at hardware and home center stores. Since the properties of each cock vary, it is important to select the proper cock for each specific application.

This is an excellent time of the year to apply cock. The width of the gaps and joints are near the midpoint of summer and winter extremes. It is also not too cold to apply many types of outdoor cock.

Most gaps or joints in the exterior should be cocked - windows, doors, outdoor plumbing penetrations, gaps into the attic, etc. Two often missed spots are gaps in the attic around pipe penetrations under the insulation and cable and pipe openings.

You will probably need to purchase several different types of cock for a long-lasting job. For example, silicone cock stays flexible and is ideal for gaps with a lot of movement, but most types cannot easily be painted. Polyurethane cock is becoming increasingly popular with do-it-yourselfers. It adheres to nearly everything and is especially good for concrete and other masonry materials. Butyl cocks are good for damp areas.

Figure on using about one-half tube of cock for each large opening. The foundation sill area, where the wall lumber rests on the top of the foundation, typically requires four to five tubes.

For large leaky gaps, use a reusable rope cock like Delta cock. It has four strands of tough fibers that are woven together and coated with a non-hardening tacky and waxy type of coating. It is easy to pull off each summer when you open your windows and save it for next year.

When cocking a very narrow gap between two materials, widen it a little first. If a gap is too narrow, the cock bead will not be wide enough to handle much joint movement without detaching or tearing.

To seal a wide gap, install a foam backer rod (usually a polyethylene or polypropylene material) into the gap first. This keeps the cock away from the back of the joint which would limit its flexibility. For very wide gaps, use foaming cock from a can. Wear gloves because it can get messy.


BHON Advice Column Launched
Posted: 2002-01-30 by Mike B

Dear BHON:
I have a problem! I am quite embarassed by my Breasts, and I don't know
what to do! They are very large, my nipples are always poking out and I
am very self concious about them! I wear big sweaters to try and hide my
figure, but a pair of 44-DDs aren't easily hidden!
Signed,
Self Concious.

Dear Giant Hooters,
By overdressing you are promoting breast growth, increased exposure to the
ultraviolet light will decrease your bra size over time, try going topless at
Port Dalhousie every Sunday this summer between 2:00 and 4:00 pm.


Dear BHON:
I'm embarrassed about my body, I'm 18 and still don't have any pubic hair!
The rest of the girls my age are sporting full Bin Laden beards "down there",
but I'm completely smooth! I'm so embarrassed, What do you advise?
Signed,
Smooth Sally.

Dear Bald and Buttery,
By overdressing, you are preventing pubic hair growth, increased exposure to the
ultraviolet light will increase your hair growth over time, try going bottomless at
Port Dalhousie every Sunday this summer between 2:00 and 4:00 pm.


Dear BHON:
I only wish I had the problems of your other writers, I'm completely flat chested and
I have feminine area hair that has gone out of control! I think I look like
Sasquatch below the waist and a little boy above! Do you suggest cosmetic Surgery?
Signed,
Flat and Furry.

Dear Trainwreck,
By underdressing you are promoting hair growth and preventing breast growth,
decreased exposure to ultraviolet light will decrease your hair growth over time,
and will decrease your bra size over time, avoid Port Dalhousie every Sunday this summer,
especially between 2:00 and 4:00 pm.


Dear BHON,
My girlfriend and I have a problem! I am a model who just recently turned 26, and in
spite of all the good-looking men in the world, my roomate and I can't seem to shake our
craving for each other. I have the urge to make crazy, passionate love to my thin,
large-breasted, shapely female roomate, even though she only just turned 19.
What shall I do?
Signed,
Dazed and Confused.

Dear Pbbbbt x 2,
By holding your inhibitions inside, you are preventing normal societal growth. Increased
exposure to ultraviolet light will encourage the natural balance of your life, try engaging
in various sexual activities with your roommate at Port Dalhousie ever Sunday this summer
between 2:00 and 4:00 pm.




Highlights from the Mike G - MDA Telethon
Posted: 2001-12-01 by Mike B

LINK


Spy Camera Pictures of "You Know Who" at Tim Hortons
Posted: 2001-11-01 by Mike B

LINK


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